Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Celia's LiveJournal:

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Friday, September 26th, 2003
11:12 am	There's something missing I feel empty. I haven't been very happy the whole of this summer really. I mean I've had quite a lot of good times - going out and doing stuff with friends and V Festival was the best weekend of my life!!! But in general I just haven't been overly happy. When I move down to Brighton on Monday I'm hoping that I'm going to be able to make some changes in my life. I am going to set myself some goals and aims, cos I spend too much time being negative lately and I dislike myself even more for it, this then turns into a circle of feeling down and hating myself and I need to get out of this trap! I feel I can do it once I get away! I haven't really been writing here much, I posted a lot in my journal at www.interference.com which is a great U2 message board, but I've got bored posting my thoughts there so I've come back here. I always feel that I just type a load of crap in this journal which is what I'm doing now, but I feel I need to type a load of shit because I rarely talk about shit in general cos it annoys me when other people talk about shit all the time! so there I'm in a funny mood and I'm going to go and make a cup of tea and get some more stuff ready for Uni and BLAH! Current Mood: indescribable Current Music: Out Of Control - U2
Wednesday, September 24th, 2003
2:40 pm	Faraway So Close Wanted to see U2:UK tonight but Can't get there anymore! Shame! Oh well I'm sure they'll come down south again in a few months or something. Been packing clothes and stuff away for Uni. I'm sooo ready to just get back down to Brighton again now!
Friday, September 12th, 2003
1:06 pm	RIP the man in black Well you wonder why I always dress in black Why you never see bright colors on my back And why does my appearance seem to have a somber tone Well there's a reason for the things that I have on I wear the black for the poor and the beaten down Livin' in the hopeless hungry side of town I wear it for the prisoner who has long paid for his crime But is there because he's a victim of the times I wear the black for those who've never read Or listened to the words that Jesus said About the road to happiness through love and charity Why you'd think he's talking straight to you and me Well we're doin' mighty fine I do suppose In our streak of lightning cars and fancy clothes But just so we're reminded of the ones who are held back Up front there oughta be a man in black I wear it for the sick and lonely old For the reckless ones whose bad trip left them cold I wear the black in morning for the lives that could have been Each week we lose a hundred fine young men And I wear it for the thousands who have died Believin' that the Lord was on their side I wear it for another hundred thousand who have died Believin' that we all were on their side Well there's things that never will be right I know And things need changin' everywhere you go But till we start to make a move to make a few things right You'll never see me wear a suit of white Oh I'd love to wear a rainbow every day and tell the world that everything's okay But I'll try to carry off a little darkness on my back Till things're brighter I'm the man in black thank you for your music :) Current Mood: thankful Current Music: man in black - johnny cash
Thursday, September 11th, 2003
10:13 am	2 years gone by already! Peace and Love to anyone who lost someone dear to them on September 11th Heaven on Earth We need it now I'm sick of all of this Hanging around Sick of sorrow I'm sick of the pain I'm sick of hearing Again and again That there's gonna be Peace on Earth Current Mood: morose Current Music: Peace On Earth - U2
10:04 am	Rise of the machines+Clever people lack common sense Saw Terminator 3 with Louis last week! Thought it was a good film. More funny than the first 2! The woman terminator was pretty cool! Arnie looks sooo good for his age! I love his accent, his one liners in films "I'll drive", "She'll be back" are sooo stupid yet so funny! Clever people seem to have no common sense though, I have to laugh at the fool Louis went to Grammar and now he's at Cambridge Uni and he picks me up to take me to the cinema and then once the film has ended! when we go to the car park he's like oh crap they close it at 6.30pm don't they!...and what was the time! 6.32pm So we went to see if it was still open! NOPE! So I said well lets just walk up the back where the cars come out. Luckily we could get in and they left the barrier up! He is one of the most intelligent people ever and he's such a FOOL!!! I could make an endless list of stupid things he's done and said yet he gets A* in any work he does! What's that about?
Tuesday, September 9th, 2003
12:07 pm	David Blaine Hmmmmm GOOD LUCK! Current Mood: contemplative Current Music: MLK - U2
Saturday, September 6th, 2003
2:24 pm	The Piano Teacher I had no idea what this film was about, it came on TV the other night after "Jack & Sarah" which is one of my favourite films! Synopsis: Erika (Isabelle Huppert) is a piano teacher at a prestigious music school in Vienna who still lives with her overprotective and controlling mother (Annie Girardot). Lonely and alienated, Erika finds solace by visiting sex shops and experimenting with masochism. At a recital, she befriends Walter (Beno?t Magimel), a handsome young man, whom she seduces and begins an illicit affair with. As Erika slowly drifts closer to the brink of emotional disorder, she uses the love-stricken Walter to explore her darkest sado-masochistic fantasies. The film did actually really move me. As someone said it made me feel Shocked, Sick and Sad. Current Mood: uncomfortable Current Music: Tori Amos - Northern Lad
Saturday, August 30th, 2003
2:06 pm	I feel sick to the stomach! When I came in from clubbing last night I put the TV on to find this at 3.30am: DISPATCHES: CONGO'S KILLING FIELD To sum it up from the website: Sam Kiley and a Dispatches team report from a besieged town in the heart of the war in Congo. They meet the warlords presiding over a battlefield where rape, slaughter and cannibalism are a reality - and the civilians who're struggling to survive. They reveal how locals blame neighboring Rwanda and Uganda for arming the gunslingers. Rwanda and Uganda are Britain's closest allies in central Africa and they receive aid of over ?100 million a year. One part that really got to me was this woman talking about them coming in and shooting as well as cutting all her family with machetes. She said they kept cutting them even after they were dead they carried on cutting them. Amongst the people tortured and killed were a 4yr old and a 1+a half year old. So much pain and suffering happening constantly. Why? I don't understand, I feel just sick and sad and angry! Also I don't know what it is but everytime I put the TV there's some shitty story that makes me just want to EXPLODE! Fred and Rose West. SICK SICK SICK! Flicking through channels this was on. The things they did to their OWN DAUGHTERS and other girls!!! I can't even write about these type of 'human beings' I'm lost for words! "Sometimes I feel like I don't know Sometimes I feel like checking out" Current Mood: depressed Current Music: Offer - Alanis Morissette
Thursday, August 21st, 2003
11:36 am	Well I haven't been feeling very well the last few days since I got back from V2003! Had an awful cold and I'm quite sun burnt, so my poor nose is quite sore! :( Oh well it was worth feeling like this to see Coldplay and PJ Harvey...and more... Current Mood: tired Current Music: What's Going On - Bono & Chris Martin
Monday, August 18th, 2003
7:24 pm	V2003 Festival! - Sunday! (Red Hot Chili Peppers+More) So after an amazing day Saturday, Sunday's line up was just as good!!! As soon as we got through the gates me and my mates headed straight for the main stage because TOM MCRAE was on first thing and I love him, although my friends didn't know who he was they trusted me and thought he was pretty good (well apart from Matt lol) There weren't many people so I was near the front and had a great view! His songs are sooo beautiful and was a perfect way to start the day! He ended with saying "Festivals are all about Peace and Love so I will end with a song about killing people" haha! So next up was SKIN who me and Vic were looking forward to. Again not many people were near the front and most people were just sitting around so we had a great view!!! What can I say about SKIN!!! I was totally blown away by the woman!!! I didn't think she would be that good, and I've come away from V2003 being converted into a HUGE SKIN FAN! She was great, the crowd involvement was great, she had sooo much energy, her Voice was fantastic. She crowd surfed and was just amazing to see and hear! There was one point where a load of blown up beach balls were being hit around the crowd and when she was up hugging the people at the front and singing Matt punched the Ball and it hit her on the head! HAHAHA!!! She laughed and carried on singing and then she got hit again by another one!!! Was brilliant! I really do want to see this woman again...she's made me want her solo and make me did out my SKUNK ANASIE CD's! Next up were INSPIRAL CARPETS, I didn't really have a clue who they were, I thought they sounded all right at first but then I got a bit bored of them, so we went off and got some lunch etc for a bit. MORCHEEBA came on next and I don't mind a couple of their songs but again after a while they were a bit boring and I was just getting really excited because one of my favorite artists were to come one next - PJ HARVEY!!! - My friends wanted to go and see Distillers on the NME stage so we said we'd meet back up later and I made my way further up the front for PJ HARVEY! As soon as she came on I was gob smacked!!! She looked absolutely amazing...wearing this little white silky dress she looked beautiful. She did a great set list which included a lot of stuff from her earlier albums and I was well pleased that she played RID OF ME and I went totally mad for that song! I have to say I was rather pissed off with the crowd because I was about 5th row from the front but everyone around me were standing dead still as if they were waiting for a fucking bus!!! Luckily I was standing next to a girl and boy who were big PJ fans and them and their mates were jumping around with me and we were trying to wake the rest of the crowd up, but there wasn't really much joy. I guess one good thing was that we could see Poll really well, and she kept looking over and smiling at me because she could see me jumping and singing along at the top of my voice to the songs! So After PJ HARVEY I had nearly killed myself - (Death by Jumping and Singing haha) so I had to go and get more water and have a rest! QUEENS OF THE STONEAGE were on next and I had to meet up again with the others sooo I sat down a bit whilst listening to QUEENS (who were rather good but I'm not familiar with a lot of the stuff they played). Then met back up with the others in good enough time for DAVID GRAY! We stayed a bit further back for David Gray because we had been at the front of the stage for most of the day and I wanted to experience the whole stage and lights in full and not be too squashed for a bit. I thought David Gray was all right, (My friends were really NOT impressed with him and thought he was boring. They are all huge Chili Fans and were getting excited for when they were coming on) I thought David Gray was all right, not too sure he suited being before the Chilis! Be Mine, Babylon, Dead In The Water & Sail Away were my highlights of the evening! It was also really funny cos he said Bo and the crowd just laughed and he said sonething along the lines of..."Come on you fucking idiots, you should know when i say BO you say Selecta" haha Anyway the final headliners for Sunday Chelmsford where the RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS!!! Now my friends were really excited about them, I can't say I was excited as much as them cos I'm more of a Coldplay fan, but we made our way closer to the front, not too close because we had learnt from the FOO FIGHTERS and didn't really wanna get Crushed to death! Anyway they came on and kicked started with BY THE WAY! Flea was in this skelenton suit and he looked cool! Antony looked great as always! - They played a lot of songs from CALIFORNICATION and BY THE WAY, which I enjoyed as I knew these 2 albums the best, but i have to say they din't impress me as much as I hoped for! They were really good but there just seemed to be somthing missing, (a kind of atmosphere that come with a coldplay and U2 concer), even my mates shocked me by after the gig saying they were good but I wouldn't see them again. Anyway I'm glad I saw them becasue they did put on a great show and it was amazing everyone shouting along to the songs! :) All in All A FANTASTIC WEEKEND! One of the best of my life, and I can't wait to go to another festvial next summer! Hopefully Glastonbury maybe... Current Mood: pleased Current Music: Who The Fuck - PJ Harvey
2:18 pm	V2003 Festival! - Saturday's Music! What an amazing time I had this weekend! We arrived Friday, set up out tent etc, had a look round and watched a movie in the JJB tent before going to sleep...we wanted to get a good nights sleep so we had loads of energy for all the great bands Staurday and Sunday... SATURDAY: We got let in the gates at 12pm. First we had a look around, cos we didn't know where everything was, so found out where each stage was and had a look at some stalls. Then we went over to the main stage in time for ECHO & THE BUNNYMEN because I like them. So we sat down on the sloping bit and just chilled watching them! They were really good! We stayed sitting where we were for REEL BIG FISH because we all liked them, they were really good, funny as well! Next were THE CARDIGANS! They were better than what I thought they would be, like quite a few of their songs. We then decided to get something to eat and make our way down to nearer the front after for THE HIVES. I only knew a couple of songs by THE HIVES but they were really good! I loved the singer, at first I thought he was a bit of a big head, but he could get away with it! Great performance! At this point we were getting closer and closer to the main stage and next on were ASH! they were really good and we had a good old dance along to them! Shining Light got the crowd going! FOO FIGHTERS were up next and at this point I was getting very excited cos COLDPLAY were getting very close!!! FOO FIGHTERS kicked off with ALL MY LIFE and because me, Jen, Vic, and Matt were very close to the front everyone was going mad and jumping around pushing & shoving and I thought we were all gonna get totally Crushed! At first it was funny but then people really started pissing us off and we were ending up further and further back, after a few songs it got a bit calmer though. Dave Grohl said "V2003 is supposed to be the posh festival but it doesn't look very Posh down here at the front" haha The FOOS did really rock! Good set! And to finish off on Saturday Night, What I had been waiting for, for months COLDPLAY!!! After Foos I made a quick dash for the front as some people left. I amazingly managed to get 3rd Row from the front, centre and had perfect view of Chris Martins microphone and his piano so I was dead excited! When they came out the crowd of thousands of people went mad!!!! The set list was totally amazing, I dont think it could have been much better!: 'Politik' 'One I Love' 'Trouble' 'God Put A Smile Upon Your Face' 'Shiver' 'The Scientist' 'Daylight' 'New Song 1 ( Poor Me)' 'Everything's Not Lost' 'New Song 2 (your world turned upside down)' 'Yellow' 'Amsterdam' (ENCORE) ...................... 'Clocks' 'In My Place' 'A Rush Of Blood To The Head' 'What A Wonderful World' He did a bit of Justin Rock Your Body at one point as well, Was really funny, also he coughed and fell backwards off his piano stall during 'The Scientist' which was funny! He also moved around loads when he wasn't playing the piano and was a great mover! Even my mate cried during The Scientist and shes not even a fan! haha! We all spent the whole weekend laughing at her! :) ..............(Sunday Review coming soon)................. Current Mood: happy Current Music: The Scientist - Coldplay
Monday, August 11th, 2003
1:50 pm	PJ Harvey Good Fortune Threw my bad fortune Off the top of A tall building But I'd rather have done it with you Your boy's smile Five in the morning Looked into your eyes And I was really in love In Chinatown Hungover You showed me Just what I could do Talking about Time travel And the meaning And just what it was worth And I feel like some bird of paradise My bad fortune slipping away And I feel the innocence of a child Everybody's got something good to say Things I once thought Unbelievable In my life Have all taken place When we walked through Little Italy I saw my reflection Come right off your face I paint pictures To remember You're too beautiful To put into words Like a gypsy You dance in circles All around me And all over the world * And I feel like.... So I take my Good fortune And I fantasize Of our leaving Like some modern-day Gypsy landslide Like some modern-day Bonnie and Clyde On the run again
1:20 pm	101 Got to 101 degrees yesterday in ENGLAND!.....ahhh....I REALLY hope it cools down a bit for this weekend cos it'll spoil the Festival, How can we jump around to coldplay etc. in this heat? 5 Days to go...wahooo, we have decided that we will get there for Friday evening so we can put the tent up slowly and we won't have a mad rush on the Saturday morning... I'm getting VEEEEERY excited now!!! Current Mood: pleased Current Music: Foo Fighters - All My Life
Friday, August 8th, 2003
10:39 am	1 Week And I'll be leaving for V2003!!!!!!! I'm soooooo excited!!!!!! Current Mood: ecstatic Current Music: Sky Lit Up - PJ Harvey
Thursday, August 7th, 2003
8:01 am	My name: celia is the #371 most common female name. 0.044% of females in the US are named celia. Around 56100 US females are named celia! http://www.namestatistics.com/ Current Mood: artistic Current Music: Dead In The Water - David gray
Sunday, August 3rd, 2003
9:22 pm	Shawshank Redemption Was in the need of being reminded how strong and important HOPE is...The Shawshank Redemption is one of my favourite books and movies ever! The emotion, characters, life, passion, loss, freedom, HOPE etc of the film always makes me think.... "Get Busy Living or Get Busy Dying" Current Mood: hopeful Current Music: Everything's Not Lost - Coldplay
9:17 pm	Crap week... Been feeling shit all week...I didn't really help myself snap out of it much, just stayed in most of the time listening to music... Worried about my Grandad, age comes to us all, I guess, I just don't want him to be feeling low and be in any sort of pain. Been feeling very spiritual lately... Anyway enough jargon...the weekend got better! went out for a piss up last night, to the point where I felt ill, but I needed that!... Current Mood: crappy Current Music: Your Blue Room - U2
Thursday, July 31st, 2003
4:17 pm	RoBONObbie Williams Radio 1 Interview with Robbie Williams talking about his concert "I thought I?m gonna pick one tonight that?s good looking, because quite frankly a lot of them have been like? mercy kisses. Is that bad? It?s the truth. She gets up on stage? I?ve seen Bono do it, so I?m thinking I?m going to have a roll around like Bono does. And with Bono they are like very respectful and they just lie next to him and listen to him, but with me?she put her hands down me pants last night, she put a tongue down me mouth, she was trying to rip me vest off and I?m singing Come Undone, really trying to maintain the fact that these people think that I?m a bit cool and that and this girl?s? I?m not in control of, and I actually at one point she was locked like a vise grip, writhing on me. And I?m thinking, this has gone too far now, so I tried to pull her off and sit next to her, a la Bono, and then she straddles the top of me and starts grinding. Now normally this wouldn?t be a problem? but there?s 60,000 other people there and so I tried to grab her hair to make it look like I?m doing a sexy grab her hair bit, but actually what I was doing is trying to pull her off me!? Maybe Bono chooses who he gets up on stage carefully...lol Current Mood: giggly Current Music: Strong - Robbie Williams
11:13 am	Personality Test: MASTERMIND Submissive Introvert Abstract Thinker Like just 8% of the population you are a MASTERMIND (SIAT). You can be silent and withdrawn, but behind your reserved exterior lies an active mind that allows you to analyze situations and come up with creative, unexpected solutions. Normal people call this "scheming." Don't learn German. Anyway, your sense of style and originality are your strengths, and people will respect your judgment once they get to know you. If you learn to be a little more personable, you could be a great leader--you've definitely got the "vision" thing down. Just make sure all the plotting you do behind those eyes of yours is healthy. Famous masterminds in television: Dr. Claw, The Scarecrow and Mrs. King, Montgomery Burns.
2:12 am	Mr MacPhisto Mr. MacPhisto's farewell speech and phone call: Look what you've done to me You've made me very famous, and I thank you I know you like your pop stars to be exciting So I bought... these Now my time among you is almost at an end The glory of ZooTV must ascend and take its place With all the other satellites Don't fear, for I'll be watching you I leave behind video cameras for each of you So many listening tonight, I... have a list: People of America (shush) I gave you Bill Clinton I put him on CNN, NBC, C-SPAN To tall to be a despot, but watch him closely People of Asia Your time is coming Without your tiny transistors None of this would be possible People of Europe When I came among you You where squabbling like children Now you're all hooked up to one cable As close together as... stations on a dial People of the former Soviet Union I gave you capitalism So now you can all dream of being As wealthy and glamorous as me People of Sarajevo Count your blessings There are those all over the world Who have food, heat, and security But they're not on TV like you are Frank Sinatra I give you MTV demographic You're welcome Salman Rushdie I give you decibels Goodbye Squidgy I hope they give you Wales Goodbye Micheal Goodbye all you Neo-Nazi's I hope they give you Auschwitz Around about this time, I often make a telephone call Some, some... sometimes to the President of the United States But not, not, not tonight Tonight I'm, I'm going to call a taxi to take me home 'Cause I am tired Hello? My name is Mr. MacPhisto I'm looking for a taxi to take me from Sydney from - [Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<oh,>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.] Mr. MacPhisto's farewell speech and phone call: Look what you've done to me You've made me very famous, and I thank you I know you like your pop stars to be exciting So I bought... these Now my time among you is almost at an end The glory of ZooTV must ascend and take its place With all the other satellites Don't fear, for I'll be watching you I leave behind video cameras for each of you So many listening tonight, I... have a list: People of America (shush) I gave you Bill Clinton I put him on CNN, NBC, C-SPAN To tall to be a despot, but watch him closely People of Asia Your time is coming Without your tiny transistors None of this would be possible People of Europe When I came among you You where squabbling like children Now you're all hooked up to one cable As close together as... stations on a dial People of the former Soviet Union I gave you capitalism So now you can all dream of being As wealthy and glamorous as me People of Sarajevo Count your blessings There are those all over the world Who have food, heat, and security But they're not on TV like you are Frank Sinatra I give you MTV demographic You're welcome Salman Rushdie I give you decibels Goodbye Squidgy I hope they give you Wales Goodbye Micheal Goodbye all you Neo-Nazi's I hope they give you Auschwitz Around about this time, I often make a telephone call Some, some... sometimes to the President of the United States But not, not, not tonight Tonight I'm, I'm going to call a taxi to take me home 'Cause I am tired <Thank you for calling Taxi Services> Hello? <Can you tell me your name and place please> My name is Mr. MacPhisto I'm looking for a taxi to take me from Sydney from - <Oh, I'm so sorry sir, what is your name? Hello?> My name is Mr. MacPhisto <What is this, a joke?> Hello, what is your name Hello? Show me the way to go home I'm tired and I want to go to bed I had a little drink about an hour ago And it's gone right to my head... Current Mood: tired Current Music: Dreaming With Tears In My Eyes - U2